sleep doesn't always come and go easily

there are times i struggle with sleep

nights where i stare awake... counting the minutes run off the clock

nights where dreams make me wish i where awake

sometimes my dreams can be far worse than any reality i've ever faced

sometimes my dreams can be the place i long to be

but its the nights that are full of nightmares that i fear...
these nights keep me awake out of terror of what my mind can create.

i'd rather count the stars than shut my eyes again...
i know when i drift off, i'll be fighting...

the nightmares where i know i'm dreaming ...some of the most terrible things.. but I  cannot force my eyes to open...these make my heart race

the nightmares where i know i'm dreaming and they are made of some forced reality... are the ones that are so unbecomingly unwelcome

 i long for sleep during all this, merely to rest my head, to rescue me from the spinning from all the sights i've seen.
but i'm too afraid to sleep in fear of what my mind might make up..

i go to bed each night and wonder aloud what the night holds...
will the good out run the bad?
will the darkness overtake the light?
will i remember to fight?
will i remember any of it at all?


sometimes i struggle with sleep